My husband and I spent our Christmas Eve at the hospital. My husband’s 40-year old cousin suffered a heart attack.

It was devastating to watch our loved one struggle to find the energy to speak to us, or walk the corridors of the hospital.

He is a caregiver for his family and owner of his own small business. One of the main contributing factors to his present condition was stress.

As caregivers, we’re all familiar with the word stress. It’s synonymous with the caregiving.

As caregivers, we also put other people’s needs before our own needs.

There is something to be said about our generosity and selflessness, but unless we take care of ourselves, who will?

In my case, if my husband’s cousin were to pass away, who would provide for his family? And as clients come into our office to meet with my colleague, Jerry Rothkoff, and I, we often say that the most important person in the room is the primary caregiver; for without that person, who would coordinate the elderly person’s care needs?

This time of year is especially a poignant one. Not only have we had the opportunity to spend time with family and friends, but it’s a new year. And a new year means making a commitment to care for yourself and manage the level of stress in your life.

Now, I didn’t say this would be easy, but unless, we take a few minutes for ourselves several times a week, who knows how our body would react or revolt against the levels of self-imposed stress?

· Can you ask a friend, neighbor, or family member to watch your loved one at least 30 minutes three times a week, so you could take a brisk walk?

· Are there ways to eat healthier? Instead of picking up a bag of chips in order to eat away the stress of your day, can you substitute the chips with rice cakes, apples, or raisins?

· How about reaching out to a counselor or licensed clinical social worker, in which you would have the opportunity to divulge your emotions in a safe, non-threatening environment?

· How about connecting to a local support group? There are many area support groups that focus on caring for stroke survivors, loved ones with dementia, or those affected by diabetes. Not only would you have the opportunity to meet others who share in your struggles, but you might learn a new tip or two to help you with your daily caregiving tasks.

My husband’s cousin returned home the Sunday after Christmas. His heart now has to work twice as hard in order to function, and because he is so young, he has the potential of suffering additional heart attacks.

Stress is a real factor. Therefore, as responsible and diligent caregivers, let’s acknowledge how stress impacts our physical and emotional well-being, and let’s take the necessary steps to ensure that it doesn’t conquer us.

Resources:

· Alzheimer’s Association - www.alz.org
· New Jersey Ease for your local Office on Aging – 1-877-222-3737.
· Delaware Valley Stroke Council – www.phillystroke.org